10.29.2008

i have decided

that after I go in January and pick up my stuff i am deleting this blog entirly. I dont really need a reson. I just know I will need to do it.

10.23.2008

possibly

one of the most agravating things about a divorce, is having to keep your mouth shut. But here I am not going to care, I am sure this will come back sometime to haunt me...but at this point i dont care.

we have been emailing back and forth because talking on the phone wasnt working. So, We had agreeed to live and let live, and email about the divorce and stuff; which is fine. Problem is every email I was getting from him had a snide remark in it. I have ignored most of them, because what good would it do me to tell him he's wrong. That he has flat out told lies to everyone about me, tyrell, and himself. What good would that do? seriously. So all of that ignored. But that doesnt mean I wasnt writing about it, I just wasnt sending it to him. So I have a couple of draft messages in my inbox that would be more suiting here.

Yes, I did leave you with debts of stuff that we used. I also left you the house, which if you sell it, by my calculations you will be able to pay off most if not all of your debt. I will be stuck with debt still which I will have to pay off for a long time, and I am also in a state that will take the money from my paychecks if I dont settle pretty soon. So as I am working my butt off I dont really have "money" I am spending it all on paying off the debts (so they dont come after my paycheck) I am also having to pay rent, and really getting no monetary help from anyone.

I left you with baasically everything. I understand you are hurt, because I left you with a way out but, I also left you. Understandably you are upset. But financially you really have no room to talk. You will come out of this divorce with pretty much everything taken care of. I on the other hand like I said will have to work to pay off my debts for several years from now.
I honestly just want this over. If I wanted to fight it Sol, if I really did want something from you I would have gone back to Colorado and filed there, and litterally taken everything. I honestly dont care, thats why I was trying to get you to let me file in Nevada, because I was trying to help you. Legally sp3eaking by filing in Nevada you come out of this sitting pretty. It wouldnt be that way in Colorado, I knew that, thats why I insisted on you letting me file here. I have read all of the divorce/marriage laws in both states.
I honestly just want out. Clean and simple. I am sorry I did the paperwork wrong the first time.

There is more but I dont really care right now.

10.13.2008

3 Things

There was 3 things I promised myself I would accomplish before moving on from Reno.

1. See my cousins and Annie through a whole year of school.
2. Live on my own, completely financially free of help from friends and family.
3. Take a least one semester of College. 2-3 classes.

I look at myself. I have been here since late July. Almost 4 whole months.
I was doing really well up until about 2 weeks ago. That’s when I ate a sandwich from walmart that I shouldn’t have. I got really sick (I got my gallbladder taken out a year ago and have had problem eating certain things ever since)
I had to take 3 days off of work. Those 3 days happened to be in the same 2 week period I had asked for a Sat-Sun off. Which made me actually miss 4 days of work. Seriously hurting me financially.

To top it all off I got what I thought was a seasonal change of allergies, turns out it was a UTI turned ugly. I have been lying in bed for almost 3 days because of that; I also had to miss yesterday from work.

I was also informed the other day that frankly Me nor Tyrell is welcome here. So I need to move. again.

This time since my choices have been narrowed down to zero. I have to move to Carson a hell of a lot sooner than I would like. Like November sooner. So come November I will be moving in with Tyrell. I have no idea how I will pull this off with my family. Last move was even a problem. this one will be hell.

If I do move to Carson it will make #3 easy. and frankly #2 wasnt really happening with my $8 an hour job anywho. So if I do move in with Tyrell and pay half rent and share utilities, we can both start paying off our debts. Which will help us both out. thus #2 gets completed. I can see my cousins and Annie by bus whenever I want. Its $4 one way on the bus.

So by taking this route I am solving #1-3 at once.

&& now if my family would only understand :(

3 Things

There was 3 things I promised myself I would accomplish before moving on from Reno.

1. See my cousins and Annie through a whole year of school.
2. Live on my own, completely financially free of help from friends and family.
3. Take a least one semester of College. 2-3 classes.

I look at myself. I have been here since late July. Almost 4 whole months.
I was doing really well up until about 2 weeks ago. That's when I ate a sandwich from walmart that I shouldn't have. I got really sick (I got my gallbladder taken out a year ago and have had problem eating certain things ever since)
I had to take 3 days off of work. Those 3 days happened to be in the same 2 week period I had asked for a Sat-Sun off. Which made me actually miss 4 days of work. Seriously hurting me financially.

To top it all off I got what I thought was a seasonal change of allergies, turns out   it was a UTI turned ugly. I have been lying in bed for almost 3 days because of that; I also had to miss yesterday from work.

I was also informed the other day that frankly Me nor Tyrell is welcome here. So I need to move. again.

This time since my choices have been narrowed down to zero. I have to move to Carson a hell of a lot sooner than I would like. Like November sooner. So come November I will be moving in with Tyrell. I have no idea how I will pull this off with my family. Last move was even a problem. this one will be hell.

If I do move to Carson it will make #3 easy. and frankly #2 wasnt really happening with my $8 an hour job anywho. So if I do move in with Tyrell and pay half rent and share utilities, we can both start paying off our debts. Which will help us both out. thus #2 gets completed. I can see my cousins and Annie by bus whenever I want. Its $4 one way on the bus.

So by taking this route I am solving #1-3 at once.

&& now if my family would only understand :(
I am not trying to play games and I wasnt lying. All I didnt send you was a paper that my grandma signed. And we had discussed that I would send you the papers you had to sign then you would send them back and I would file them. I dont mind paying the entire fee. But If you insist on sending them in yourself then Ill just let you pay the fees. you can get a fee waiver since you have no job anyways. So again like everything else in this divorce you end up on top. and what in the world can I do with your signature? what would I want with it anyways?

I just want this all to end. OK? 

Do you want to send in the papers? if so, I will send you my personal agreement and the Afidavit of witness next week. I will expect you to pay the filing fees if you do it this way.

I would like you to send the papers back because I am afraid that you could have thrown something in there.

If you do decide to file in Colroado. I would like to warn you that I will fight it. and I will come out of this on top. I have been making house payments, I have been making utilty bill payments, I was technically owner of the property for quite some time. I can prove it. and I will. I will walk away with no debt. If you let me file in Nevada you walk away with everything. and like you said if you can sell the house you will pay off the house and the majority of your debt. I dont see how this is a big issue. I am letting you WALK AWAY. while I will still have about $10,000 worth of debt. 

And on the off chance that you have already sent in the paperwork. You just screwed both of us.

Thank you,
Amber